Monday, December 11, 2006

Mr. and Mrs. Claus

Santa is real and living in Houston, Texas under the alias Mr. and Mrs. O`Hair.

I awoke Sunday morning to the sound of a Japanese postman (one of Santa`s little helpers) knocking on my door. He was resting a rather large box against the wall outside my door, panting heavily. I signed for it and went at it with a knife while the door was still closing. Under bundled newspaper were all my individually wrapped Christmas presents. Green bows with red and white wrapping paper; they were the brightest, most colorful things in the room and seemed to glow in the curtained light of morning. I was immediately presented with a dilemma. Should I wait until Christmas or submit to my growing anticipation? I had built up momentum by feverishly ripping into the box because, as everyone knows, opening presents is like falling down stairs, you just keep going until there are none left.

How often are you rewarded after destroying something? Such is the highly satisfactory act of demolishing a package and finding a gift in the aftermath. And so I longed to claw into them one by one until all the pretty paper was in one crumpled pile and all the gifts in another.

But I resisted. I carefully stacked all the gifts in the corner under a beautifully adorned but invisible tree. After setting them in the most aesthetic arrangement, big ones on bottom and the smaller ones leaning or stacked on top without disturbing any bows, I backed up and sat on my bed without taking my eyes off the pile of shimmering temptation in the corner of my apartment. I made breakfast, I cleaned a little and I tried to read but all the while the gifts shinned and beckoned me like the ring did Frodo.

But the day is long and my will weak. Human nature set in and I justified that the wrapping paper concealed some very warm clothes that I would surely require before December 25th. Needless to say, Christmas came early this year. Thank you mom and dad, I love y`all! MERRY CHRISTMAS AND GOD BLESS!!!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

you are weak excuse of a specimen of the human race.

...
:)

and i'm coming over to check out the goods. CYA!

-the neighborino

daddy-o said...

This is St. Nicholas,

I'm torn...Tradition dictates that CHRISTMAS MORNING is the time to open all gifts, with the Pletcher tradition of opening the ONE gift on Christmas eve. However, the reality is that the O'Hair family could NEVER wait for the blessed morning and was swept up in the Niagra of instant gratification.
So you come by that impulse honestly.

Your Mom and I did the shopping with the phrase 'it's getting mighty cold here' in mind, so you should be able to get good use of the gifts before Christmas.

Remember the BABY,

Love,

Dad